my love is like a simile

cmacmac:

Here is my comic: Toppings. 

Enjoy.  。◕ ‿ ◕。

In a World Consumed By Cake (and puns)

perksofbeingace:

I use the cake metaphor backward to explain asexuality. They kinda get the picture.

“Imagine you live in a world obsessed with cake.  It’s everywhere.  Companies use cake to market lipstick, underwear (pants), pants (trousers), perfumes, soaps, fast food franchises, cars and vacations.

Cake:  it’s in all your favorite TV shows and movies. It graces the cover of most magazines - 9 Cake Recipes He’ll Go Wild Over” or “10 Kitchen Don’t for Great Icing”.  Even book characters spend a lot of time talking about cake.  You want to read an AU fan fiction about your favorite show, but for some reason all they do is eat cake together instead of solving crimes.

Now, maybe you taste-tested some frosting before. Maybe you ate a piece of cake.  Either way, you aren’t very impressed.  Chocolate cake, vanilla cake, carrot cake, birthday cake … you could take it or leave it.  You’d rather just eat pie by yourself or not have dessert at all.

Some people don’t understand. How could you not want to eat cake? Cake is the best!  They keep trying to drag you into bakeries to prove it.  They worry for you.  Did you have a bad cake experience once? Are you worried about your figure?  Are you on a diet?

Meanwhile, you’re left wondering whether the recent rise in reality shows about cupcake has something to do with the Space Roar.  Either way, you’re sure you’d much rather be hiking the Appalachian Trail or volunteering to do some Pink Panther sleuthing for your Neighborhood Watch than having this cake conversation again.

Some people just aren’t that into cake, and that’s okay.  You don’t need to eat it to survive.”

jammies000:

wallywest89:

How to get a straight guy to understand common gay/sexual/relationship terms… use bacon!

perfection

areyousure-lock:

i dont understand sexual attraction??? like what about someone makes you want to rub your genitals together???

is it like really wanting a flavor of ice cream but instead of wanting to eat it, you want to stab it with your penis/stuff it into your vagina???

Sexuality is like a barbecue

ukulelewalrus:

-Some people like hot dogs

-Some people like hamburgers

-Some people get both (Bisexuals)

-Some people get both, and a salad (Pansexuals)

-Some people don’t really like meat BUT YOU HAVE NATHAN’S HOT DOGS OH MY GOD NVM GIMME (Demisexuals)

-Some people are there for the conversation (Asexuals)

-Some people show up uninvited to the barbecue and wonder why they aren’t offered any food (assholes)

jenovaii:

lelied:

When a person says, “What’s the point in even coming out as asexual, whose business is it that you don’t have sex,” I think that you aren’t considering the social implications of not desiring sex.

Read More

I’m paraphrasing, but “being asexual is like being Jewish on Christmas”  is the best analogy of it that i’ve ever seen.  You see it and you’re curious about it and maybe you tried it once or twice, and maybe just maybe you’ve done research and written stories about it, but it’s just not the same experience that everyone else has.

http://lelied.tumblr.com/post/37395184969/about-vocal-asexuals

I don’t hate sex, I just don’t enjoy it or get aroused by the partners I try it with. It’s not the worst thing you’ve ever heard to be asexual, it’s usually pretty much like being Jewish on Christmas. Yeah, I hear it’s super fun for others, but it’s not the same magical experience for me.

the-hedgehog-of-baskerville:

The Fake Film Meme: Leave me two or more actors and I will come up with a graphic/poster and synopsis for a fake film/TV show/mini series

“Okay, let’s just say there’s a baseball game. You’ve got the uh, Apple team, and the uh, Orange team. Both are really great teams, y’know? Really strong players on both sides, but everyone reckons they know which team you play on. So, uh, your Mom and your Dad and everyone thinks that you’re batting for team Apple, yeah? Because if you tell them that you’re not batting for team Apple, they think you’re batting for the other team. Which isn’t true - you just don’t really want to bat for team Apple or team Orange. You’d rather just sit in the grandstands and have a soda.”

James Latham (Tveit) has everything - the looks, the athleticism, the talent, the popularity, the grades - so when his entire college finds out that the James Latham is still a virgin, it’s a battle to his bed for all eligible bachelors and bachelorettes on campus.

Only problem is, James isn’t interested. In any of them.

The shocking discovery that James isn’t interested turns the popular boy into the freak on campus, but with the help of his best friend Rob (Garfield) and sister Trinity (Greene), James sets out to educate others, discover himself, and reinstate his popularity. 

Asexual Privilege (& lack, thereof)

mx-yamazaki:

Recently, I’ve been seeing a lot of talk (argument) amongst the queer community about whether or not hetero-romantic asexual individuals should be ‘allowed’ to identify within the ‘queer’ spectrum. I thought I’d share a few of my thoughts about this:

IDENTITY: Identity belongs to the person identifying. For example, I’m Trans and I happily identify as queer. Queer spaces generally accept this nowadays, but in days of not-so-yore trans folk were often shunned from queer spaces. Even if I identified as heterosexual, I would still be happy to identify as queer and be accepted by most queer communities. Of course, I know of trans folk who ARE trans and heterosexual and identify as straight. That’s cool too, because that’s THEIR call, not yours (as another person). And even a straight-identifying, trans, heterosexual person is welcome within the LGBT spaces because it’s a support network. Even some gay, lesbian and bi folk I know do not identify as queer, but are accepted in our communities, because we *generally* tend to understand that these folk need our support, irregardless. If you try to force an identity on someone else, that’s not identity, that’s oppression.

OPPRESSION: Ok, now lets imagine someone who is bi-curious asks to join your ‘queer’ circle and you say “no” based on this fact. That’s oppression. If that same person is called ‘slut’ or ‘fag’ or any other manner of words used in a derogatory way, that’s oppression. These are very simple concepts and i’m constantly surprised at the number of individuals who just can’t see others being oppressed. Now, let’s say that someone is interracial; say, me. I get oppression from all manner of communities, often for “not being white”, but also for “being white”. I can’t win either way. However, let’s say that another individual is interracial, but for most purposes and intents is visibly ‘white’. This doesn’t mean that this person doesn’t get oppressed, even if they don’t share the same oppressions as someone like me. For a start, there’s no racial oppression towards me from my family, but I cannot say this for all interracial persons. 

APPROPRIATION: Ok, now that the easy part is over, let’s look at appropriation. This is where a lot of people get hang-ups about accepting asexual people within the queer community. I’ll tell this one is fable form, to aid my point:

" There is a chimpanzee who is sad. Every time a primate in the forest reaches puberty, at some point they receive a magical present. Most primates receive magical bananas, some magical logs, some magical vines. Some receive even more mysterious magical gifts. Some carry their logs, bananas, vines, etc. with great pride; especially a lot of the banana-weilding-variety of simian because there were a LOT of them and they teased the others for not having bananas. So, several of the other present-carrying primates decided to form a club of non-banana-having variety. Some found pride in their magical vines or flowers or whatnots; some embraced the idea that it didn’t matter what magical thing you were carrying, but what kind of life you decided to live.

Now, our sad chimpanzee friend had never received her magical present and realised that she probably never would. Over time, she found other present-less friends in the forest and they felt that playing in the river was more fun than carrying a banana or a vine or what-have-you, anyways. But the banana-holders were mean spirited and teased her so not having a present. They told her many mean things and said that she would “get her banana one day”. But she didn’t care about bananas and wanted to join the non-banana-having club. 

However, many of the monkeys were mean. They told her that because she ate normal bananas, she was not one of them. She protested, telling them that she didn’t have a magical banana and that the others were being mean. Some accepted her, some did not.”

MOTTO OF THE STORY: The animals that did not accept her were assholes. Utter douche bags who cannot tell a tree from a papaya. If you try to say, “Well, because I have a log, I am, therefore, more oppressed by the majority of primates”. And if you do say this, I’m sorry, but you can stick that log right where the sun does not shine. And not in a pleasant way, either. Your oppression does not invalidate the oppression of others. That is a pissing contest. Asexual people clearly do not fall into the category of the majority. Even if they have one foot into straight territory, it does not mean that they are straight. They are marginalised because of their sexual orientation (or complete lack, thereof). Everyone’s experiences of oppression differ and having a pissing content over who is more oppressed over their sexuality (or anything else for that matter) makes you just as horrid a person as the people oppressing you.

People are oppressed in different ways and it always sucks. If I had but a penny for every queer person that said I wasn’t queer because I like people of any gender, I’d spend it all making kids TV shows for adults.

FINAL NOTE:

[Myra T. Johnson] portrays them as invisible, “oppressed by a consensus that they are nonexistent,” and left behind by both the sexual revolution and the feminist movement. Society either ignores or denies their existence or insists they must be ascetic for religious reasons, neurotic, or asexual for political reasons.

- On the subject of Asexuality on the ‘Asexual’ Wikipedia entry, referencing "Asexual and Autoerotic Women: Two Invisible Groups" found in ed. Gochros, H.L.; J.S. Gochros (1977). The Sexually Oppressed. Associated Press. ISBN 9780809619153)

fabulousclockwork:

lord